if you like me you must not know who I am
Pants 0. Shit 1.
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Randomize
