Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
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