just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
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