I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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