Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
Randomize