I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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