Three words: puerto rican gang bang
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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