I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
Randomize