I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
