I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
