mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
i broke my thumb. i no longer have 2 opposable thumbs. i'm sub-human. i love vicodin.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
