BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
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