i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize
