Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Randomize
