No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
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