I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
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