OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
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