Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
