My room smells like vodka and shame
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Randomize
