what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
