Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize
