No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
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