How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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