I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
Randomize