I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Randomize
