You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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