Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
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