Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
