I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
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