Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize