he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
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