What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
Randomize
