The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
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