just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
one two three fourrrrnication!
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Randomize
