Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
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