do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
Randomize