If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
