If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
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