ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
well, you know. whores of a feather.
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
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