You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
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