Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
Randomize