Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
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