Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
you are never too drunk for berry picking
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
Randomize