My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
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