I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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