Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
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