I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
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