whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize
