I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
Randomize
