Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
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