don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
