best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Im part way to drunk.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
Randomize
