She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
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